Beyond Scared Straight is a new television show on A&E that airs on Thursday nights.

In my opinion, this is one of the best shows on television right now.  It is great.  We are hooked on it.  It is a modern day, ongoing version of the “Scared Straight” documentary/program from many years ago.  And it is really well done.

The Scared Straight program consists of taking teens who have been in trouble with the law and taking them inside of a prison and letting them get a first hand look at what life in a prison is like and where they will end up if they do not start making better decisions for themselves.  At the beginning of each show they interview some of the kids and show the immature, ignorant and cavalier attitudes of the teens regarding their behavior and how they truly do not understand the grave consequences their actions can have.  However, once the kids get inside the prisons and they hear the stories of the prisoners, the attitudes of the teens often change.  And it’s fascinating to watch as some realize the gravity of their situation quickly and some are really stubborn about it.  And some never do get it.  After the prison visit is done, the show gives a follow up on the teens they have portrayed.  Some have completely cleaned up their acts and others have continued in the same behaviors.

In a day and age where it is easier and more popular to lock kids and adults up in penalizing and often inhumane correctional facilities than to help them overcome their issues, this is a very timely show.  In so many courts now teens are tried and convicted as adults but we forget that these youth are just kids and these kids have no real idea what the reality of the consequences can be for the crimes they commit.  With this program, these kids get the chance to see what they are choosing when they continue down a bad path and it is a program that all kids in trouble with the law should have access to so they can make informed decisions regarding their futures.  I can’t think of a better way that our justice system and currently incarcerated adult prisoners can help society than to participate in these programs and help the youth of our country break the negative cycles of behavior and choices that they are often falling into.  These cycles can be broken.

Thanks to A&E for creating this show, thanks to everyone who supports Scared Straight programs and thanks to the incarcerated individuals that take the time and effort to try and save a youth from going down a destructive path.    We need more efforts like this to help kids today.   We imprison more people here in America than in any other civilized nation in the world.   We spend more money in America  incarcerating people than we do educating them.  Not much good can come from this.  Negative never begets positive.

We need to invest in our youth, educate our youth, help our youth, mentor our youth, help them learn from their mistakes, and give our youth a chance and a future.

After all, the youth of our county is the future of our country.  And not just for one, but for all.

Check it out.

So, in light of these situations, many parents are faced with the problem of how to manage their own child. How do you stop the dangerous behavior and help them to do the right thing? And often times, in times of desperation, the decision goes to whether or not to call the police on your own child. The thought is, maybe the police will scare them straight. Maybe dealing with the legal system and court system will make the child realize their actions have consequences and that this behavior is to be taken seriously. Maybe some time in a juvenile detention center or with a probation officer will be just what the child needs to make better decisions.

But does this work?

It is my personal opinion that, no, it does not work. And not only does it not work, it can have the opposite effect of what you thought it would do. You have now made your child into a criminal.

You have criminalized you own own child.

Now, I’m sure there are a lot of people that would disagree with me on this. And if you have a story that shows otherwise I would love to hear it. However, in my first marriage I was married to what the court systems consider as an adult to be a career criminal. He was raised in an incredibly dysfunctional and antisocial (i.e. engaging in behavior that goes against the norms of society) family and had a heavy drug problem starting at the age of about 13.  By 14 he was engaged in antisocial behavior that had him in and out of the court system, juvenile detention centers, boys camps, etc. for all of his teen years. By 18 he was in a prison diversion program that he stayed in until about 22 years old. And the story goes on and on through adulthood.

Did his involvement with the law as a teen scare him straight? No.

He used to tell me, the only thing going to juvenile detention centers or boys camps or whatever does for a teen boy is normalize antisocial behavior for them and make that the world they know. Not only does it not scare them straight, it desensitizes them to criminal or drug behavior and that becomes their new norm. And once your child has a probation office or is involved in the system, what are the chances that families whose kids are doing the right thing and have never had any contact with the court systems are going to want your child at their house? Or have their kids be friends with your kid? Pretty low. It would be the exception. So as a kid your are now steered even more to the wrong kids because those are the kids and the kids families that will accept those situations.

Now I’m not saying this is always the case. And I’m not saying the if your child is doing something horrible or endangering him or herself or your family to a grave degree that you should not protect yourself or your other children. Of course you should. But what I am saying is that one should think twice about the long term effects of calling the police on your child. Or having the child involved in the court system. And think about what that does to the child’s self esteem and self image. The child now sees him or herself as a criminal and knows that you also see them as a criminal.  That is hard to overcome.  Especially for kids already struggling with bipolar.  It’s now just one more thing for them to deal with and overcome.

Does this experience and self image help create a healthy adult?

It’s something to consider.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. ~ Jesus Christ