Now, for those of you who don’t know or who don’t have children in school who require Special Education services, what is Inclusion?  In a nutshell, Inclusion is the new movement to take a majority of kids in public schools who have been in Special Education classes [some of them for years now], take them out of the specialized, smaller and separate classes that parents and advocates fought so hard for so  many years to get for these kids, and dump them back into mainstream classes with a support staff member that is supposed to co-teach with the main teacher to help the ’special’ kids.

Why is there a push for Inclusion?  Well, money is the real reason.  It costs less.  If you are to ask a School Administration or Commissioner, though, they will tell you that move is prompted because students need to be with their same age ‘normal’ peers.  They need to see ‘normal’ social interaction, be taught at the same level as all of the other kids, and have the same opportunities as all of the other kids in school.  Separating them hurts them more than it helps them.

But is this really true?

In our experience, no.  Inclusion was the death of us with the public school system.  Granted, we homeschool now and I would not trade that for anything.  It has done wonders for my son and we will never go back to public schools unless we move to a state where you can pick and choose the classes your child takes, homeschool for part of the day, and play public school sports as a part-time homeschooler (because after all, we do pay the same taxes as everyone else to pay for those schools and sports).  But honestly, Special Education services were the only thing that worked for us in public school.  My son has a hard enough time learning in small classes in huge schools.  Do away with that, put him in a middle school class of 30-35 kids and two teachers, and it is a death sentence.  Now he has to deal not only with just trying to learn at the same pace and level as his more advanced peers but also with the commotion and actions and behavior of himself as well all of the kids in the class (many of whom are frustrated and struggling as well) and simultaneously listen to two different teachers.  All in one room.

Disaster.

And doesn’t this move to Inclusion go against everything that caring parents and advocates fought so hard for for so many years with regard to the Americans with Disabilities Act, IDEA and FAPE?

Yes, it does.

So, what to do…what to do?  Honestly, I don’t know.  And I no longer have a horse in that race.  But it concerns me greatly for those that do and for our society in general.

I know in our state the drop-out rate in the 9th grade is over 50% .  And that is pretty standard across the county.  And that was before Inclusion.  My guess is that it will increase now as these kids get more and more frustrated and say to hell with it. I know a Special Education teacher at Rye’s previous school told me that due to Inclusion they are now sending many 8th grade kids this year on to the ninth grade to enter Algebra class at the high school with a current 2nd grade math level.   Because they just cannot reach these kids in a class of 35 kids and 2 teachers.   And they cannot hold them all back.

So, what do they do? I don’t have any answers but I know that at this rate things will get worse before they get better and it breaks my heart that people work so hard in this country to make progress for disabled rights and help our future generations only to have it all undone but some bureaucrats that don’t want to spend money on education or mental health services, all in the name of ‘helping’ our kids.

Yes, by all means, thanks for the ‘help’.

And if you think Special Education services are expensive, wait for the bill on all of these kids as they grow up and become adults with no education, no life skills, and no way to adequately support themselves or their families.

Now that will be expensive.

Yesterday I did an interview for Mommy Lebron and the Bipolar Tuesday section of her blog, Rage Against The Washing Machine.

Check it out.

http://mommylebron.wordpress.com/2011/02/01/bipolar-tuesday-voices-from-the-front/

And thanks Mommy Lebron for contacting me to participate in this.

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In general what to find to be the biggest issue that bipolar disorder poses to your family?

The biggest issue we find with our son having Bipolar I is that our son needs a great deal of attention and assistance and this can be physically, emotionally and financially draining.  People in the ‘outside’ world really have no idea how much effort goes into just keeping him safe and sane and functioning well enough to where he appears fine to most of the people he encounters.  And ironically, as a teen he needs much more care and assistance than he did as a younger child.  But this is due to his bipolar symptoms really coming forth more with the teen years and the hormone fluctuations.

What do you find to be your most successful strategy in dealing with the issue?

We find our life works best right now with me staying home full time and homeschooling our son.  This requires a great deal of financial sacrifice as well as other sacrifices but we find it is worth it.  We found that regular school, even with a lengthy IEP, was a huge stress for him that triggered all kinds of problems (rages, psychosis, etc) and we could not keep him stable while in public school.  I will say, though, that this really did not become a problem until middle school.  But middle school is very different than elementary school in so many ways and that environment was toxic for our son.

What are some of the most wonderful qualities your child possess that you wish others could see more often?

Our son has a million wonderful qualities and luckily this is what people see most often when they see him.  He is funny, mostly outgoing, athletic, inquisitive, engaging, and the list goes on and on. Because he is an only child and because we spend so much time and energy helping him at home and ‘behind the scenes’ most people only see the positive sides of him and that is good.   And when they do see him act out or struggling most of them already know he is bipolar and so they fairly understanding.   And if they aren’t, we don’t need them in our lives anyway.

If you could make on change to your child’s IEP, what would it be?

We don’t use an IEP anymore because we homeschool but when he was in public school he had nearly every accommodation available.  Extended time, mark in the book, read aloud, separate testing area, preferred seating, etc.  And they were all important.  In middle school all of the accommodations in the world were not enough for him as the classes were big (some 30+ kids and the small class assistance he had in elementary school had been cut from budget cuts) and not all of the teachers followed the IEP.  Also, the changing of classes, changing of teachers, overwhelmed teachers, the immaturity of the kids, social issues (girls/boys/sex/drugs/fights) all proved to be too much for him.  However, were he to have stayed in public school I think the most important IEP accommodations would be to have a safe place for him to go in the school that is quiet when he gets overwhelmed and the ability to turn in late assignments and get credit for them.

What is the most important aspect of raising a bipolar child?

Keeping a positive attitude.  It can be hard but it’s really important.  These kids struggle more than most parents will ever realize. They deal with internal battles and thought dysfunction that most parents will never understand.  And they also take on the emotions, stress and struggle of those around them as their own.  So, as hard as it can be, as a parent it is really important to keep your own emotions in check and model positive, strong, consistent and low emotion behavior.  It makes a huge difference in how your child or teen reacts to the world around them and how safe they feel, and how safe they feel directly impacts their behavior and attitude.

Yes, we are officially homeschooling again.

And now we’ll need a few days to decompress from the ‘heightened state of awareness’ lifestyle we’ve become accustomed to living.

Because when you are a special needs child or the parent of a special needs child and you are dealing with lower functioning public schools [of which there are way too many here in the often frustratingly backward Southern States], you become used to functioning at a very high internal frequency.  A state of heightened awareness and anxiety.  You hope for the best and yet continually find yourself always waiting for the call of doom.  Always waiting to hear what’s wrong with your child or what’s not being done or how your kid is not meeting expectations and what your kid is not doing… and on…and on….and on.  And everything that goes wrong is always your child’s fault.  The school is never, ever to blame.  Or is, God forbid, incompetent.

It’s exhausting.

And ultimately a waste of time, energy, self esteem, and resources.

So, once again, we bailed.  We pulled the plug.  We dared to wish for more and cried ‘Uncle’.  And thanks to Don (we love you Don!) we are lucky to have that option as the cost on all of our souls was becoming just too high.

And now…we are free!

No more worrying about IEPs that aren’t being followed.  No more annoyance over BIPs that aren’t being followed.  No more expecting people and teachers and administrators to do the right thing.  Or to do things they are supposed to do but are never actually going to do, despite being obligated by law.  Because, as many of you know, when push comes to shove the laws only are only in place to protect the schools and their staff and not the actual students.

But alas, no more.

It’s over.

Over, I say.

Now we just need to allow our bodies and minds relax again.   The experiment is over.  Public schools are not for us.  We are gypsies at heart.  Non-conformists, I suppose.   We like to march to our own drum.

Hello, relaxed homeschool life.  We’ve missed you!

Check the video out.  It’s really interesting.

I definitely have one of the kids that is told at school that they will never succeed in life because they can’t get the ‘one right answer’.  And yet, this same child can find so many alternate answers if anyone would just ask about them or be open to them.

Thanks to Christine at www.welcometomybrain.net for posting this video for me to see and pass on.

The Good News: After a few days at home, Rye is back to himself.  Perky, animated, grounded.  His usual bouncy self.

The Bad News: The cause of his mental distress was and is his school situation.

This will have to be addressed.

This is the direct result of our state pushing for and insisting on mainstreaming all kids and doing away with special education services.

Please excuse Rye’s absence from school yesterday.  Due to the fact that you insist on mainstreaming bipolar children and refuse to acknowledge children with emotional disabilities as being worthy of any significant amount of additional assistance in the public school setting, Rye is now completely stressed by your school environment and spent the day at home with me fighting off stress-induced psychosis.   Now, I know to you hallucinating and thought process challenges are no big deal and can just be overcome simply by throwing a few psychotropic medications at the child or deep breathing.  However, we have not found this to be the case.  I guess if Rye were blind, deaf, mute or paralyzed you would see that he does indeed have a disability and needs more assistance than you are willing to provide, as those are the only kids who now qualify for significant support in our school system.   Since this is not our situation, however, I can guarantee you our son will be missing many more days of school to come so perhaps you should just go ahead and sign us up for truancy court for surpassing the legal limit of 10 days of absence.

Thank you and we look forward to explaining our child’s illness and absences to a court judge.  Perhaps he or she will have spent some time in a more forward thinking and humane country, will not reside in the middle ages and will have a grain of sense regarding the impact of mental illness.  If not, I guess we will go to jail for caring about our son and not wanting him to live in Wonderland/Nightmare On Elm Street just to get a “Free Appropriate Public Education” that we pay for with our tax money.

Sincerely,

Meg

The good news is that the home life is good, Rye is doing well at home and has *so far* [I have a feeling this is about to change] what is probably his best school attendance ever.  He has only missed a couple of days so far this year and for him that is monumental.  The bad news is that the stress of school and football is starting to get to him and is tinkering with his peace of mind.  For him it is really hard to go to school, sit all day, do work that is really hard for him, and deal with all of the different kids and teachers and all of their different personalities and demands.  As a result,  he now seems to be having some occasional thought issues  and can get agitated at times (although it passes quickly).  He also today told me that at times he is seeing ghosts and such.  Not good.  So, what to do, what to do.  I guess we will call Doc and see about his meds.  I am leary to just up his meds so he can deal with school but I don’t want to just jump the gun and pull him out of school either as I know he is learning at least some of what he is supposed to be learning and it’s nice for him and I to have some time apart.  Also, its good for him to have some structure to his day and to learn to deal with different personalities, etc.   And I know there are parts of school he enjoys so it’s not a total loss.

Urgghh,  it’s always something.

And as for football, sadly his team seems to be imploding.  I guess quite a few people were turned off by the whole police/coach scene last week (us included).  Rye was completely freaked out by this (even though we weren’t even there to see it) as he has issues with feeling safe anyway and has a real issue with people that have been arrested due to experiences with BigB.  Anyway, as a result of that and some injuries due to sub-par coaching, many people are pulling off the team leaving not much left behind.   I guess we need to figure out what direction we want to go with that.

In other happenings, Rye told me yesterday after a very frustrating day at school that if possible he just wants to get his GED at 16 and go to community college and work outdoors.  He says he can’t see spending 5 more years sitting in classes all day being frustrated.  I guess I see his point.  If school was that hard for me and the stress of it made me see things, I would not want to do it either.  Although he does enjoy learning. I think the public school situation/culture may just be too much for him no matter how many IEP accommodations we have.   And  Special Education has basically been done away with where we are so there aren’t many options in the schools.  And I know there are alternatives to public school so we may need to look in that direction for the next few years.  He says he already knows that at community college you don’t sit in class all day every day and that that is more his style.  Class and then a break.  Class and then a break.  Makes sense.  And he says he never, ever wants to work in a job where he sits at a desk in an office all day.  That made me laugh.  Good for him for already knowing that about himself.

I can really see him in a job where he is outdoors all day.  That is the perfect scenario for him.  He gets great peace from nature and physical outside work.  I guess we’ll have to start looking in that direction.

So, as you know by now, we have a few difficulties with the school Rye attends.  And that would be a gross understatement.  Without going back over it all, suffice it to say this is not the most enlightened, progressive, or proactive public school in the world.  Or, even in our county  (which, by the way, has a huge discrepancy as to the level of education, facilities and services they provide to different schools within the county, some of which are only 5 minutes from each other).  Anyway,  after complaining ad nauseum to everyone under the sun, writing endless emails, and generally becoming a thorn in the side of the county, we are now maybe, hopefully making some progress.  And as of yesterday, Rye now has a Behavior Intervention Plan (BIP) as a part of his Individualized Education Plan (IEP).

What is a Behavior Intervention Plan?  As of a few months ago, I had never heard of one despite the fact that Rye has had an IEP since the first grade.  Because honestly, up until now and before he attended Fast Times at Ridgemont Middle (lets just call his school this for now) he never needed one.  And, I’m sure even now in a different environment or a private school with small classes, he would not need one again.  Nonetheless, we must live in reality.  Fast Times is where we are now and the classes are huge and the special education support is lacking so this is what we work with now.

Anyway, back to the BIP.  The Behavior Intervention Plan is a federal legal document (as is the IEP)  that is included as a part of a student’s IEP.  The function of this plan is to identify behaviors that the student has as a result of their psychiatric diagnosis that interfere with his or her learning or the learning of those around them and then to help the child in a positive manner correct and replace that behavior.   It is also used to help the child stay in school for the full day and this helps with learning as well.

The most important thing about this plan:  It protects your child from inconsistent and/or improper correction or punishment from teachers or administrators.

And if you have a special needs child in a public school, this is something that should concern you. Particularly in middle and high school.

The Behavior Intervention Plan is a federal legal contract enforceable under federal law.

The BIP is based on a Functional Behavioral Assessment (FBA) that is performed by one’s school psychologist [note: the term psychologist is used loosely here because for public schools the psychologist is rarely a PhD but rather a master's level therapist, which in any other circumstance would not have the title psychologist].  The school psychologist observes the child over a series of days and different classsroom settings, talks to teachers, talks to administrators, and develops a plan of problem/targeted behaviors and then develops a plan for the teachers to positively and proactively help the student change these behaviors a little bit at a time.

Now, I’ll admit, having the luck we’ve had with this school so far, I was really hesitant to see what was going to become of these observations and discussions and how objective the school psychologist was going to be.  Luckily in the meeting, though, I found I was pleasantly surprised.  She seemed reasonable and neutral in her bias and that was nice.

So, why is this plan worth having?  Well,  it makes is so the teachers and administrators to have to follow a pre-determined and mutually pre-agreed upon plan of correction for undesirable behaviors and to help the child replace those problem behaviors with constructive, positive behaviors.  It keeps you child out of unnecessary and/or overused time in ISS (suspension) and from being randomly punished for behavior related to their diagnosis.   And this is something we personally have had a big problem with in our school.  Teachers over-punishing for small behaviors and punishing in whatever manner they see fit, without any positive anything coming from it  except anger, frustration, lost time in the classroom and an increasingly hostile environment.

Now, will this plan work?  Will the teachers and administrators adhere to it?  If previous and present adherence to the IEP without this new plan is any indication, the answer is no.

But we will hope for the best.  And prepare for the worst.  In the case of the worst, we will file for due process.

_________

Please note:  If you have a child diagnosed with ADHD and/or Bipolar Disorder, your child qualifies for an IEP with a note from your doctor stating the diagnosis under the category of Other Health Impaired (OHI).

Today is back to school day here at the homestead.

I’m excited and nervous all at the same time.  Excited to have some time to myself.  Excited to get back into a routine.  Excited to not be on 24/7 kid duty. However, I’m nervous as well.  Rye’s school is not the pride and joy of the public school system.  They don’t have great test scores, they don’t have a lot of money or great equipment, they don’t have famous alumni or even a great track record of following IEPs.  There is something really complex about IEPs that they can’t seem to get.  Apparently the concept of Federal Law is a real mind bender.   But alas, Don and I are a united front this year and we have an advocate to help as well.  If the school can follow the IEP, we are good.  We are happy.  Blissful, even.  If not (and God Bless Them, they have already tried to not follow it with regard to scheduling before school even started), we are going to be on them.

On them, on them, on them, on them.

Have a good day at school, Rye!

It’s over.  Take the pig head off the stake.  Put the bonfire out.  Wipe the warpaint off your faces.  And before you kill the kid with the glasses, we are out.   Over and out.

The adults are back in charge.  Sanity is restored.

And we all exhale…

Goodbye public school.

Hello new world.