So, here goes:

When was Rye diagnosed?

Rye was diagnosed with adhd at 5 years old.  He was diagnosed as having bipolar disorder at 6 years old when he was hospitalized for a manic/psychotic reaction to Adderall & Risperdal.  He was actively hallucinating, actively threatening suicide, thought dogs were biting him, thought God was talking to him and asking him to meet him in trees, etc, etc.  He also had a grand mal seizure. While in the hospital the onsite doctors changed his diagnosis from adhd to bipolar disorder and changed his medications to Depakote & Lithium.  He stabilized and the hallucinations and erratic behavior went away.  We, as parents, kept him on Depakote & Lithium for about 4 months or so until we weaned him off of them deciding that there was no way he could be bipolar that young and that it was more likely just an adverse reation to the Adderall and Risperdal.  As it turns out, as parents we were right and wrong.  Right in that he did stay medication free until he was 11 years old and was often high energy and inattentive in school but did fine overall.  Wrong in that at 12 years old he would again be diagnosed as having bipolar disorder and got to where he could not function well without mood stabilizers. And that is where we are today.

Has he always shown signs of bipolar ( from birth)?

That’s hard to say.  Rye was a great kid overall.  He is generally very happy, outgoing and pretty tough and independent and always has been.  However, signs I can maybe see looking back?  As a baby he was very colicy and needed to be held a lot. He started in full time daycare at 6 months old and did fine.  He was happy and personable and social but needed a radio turned on real low in his crib with him to fall asleep.  The daycare staff, who were very attached to him,  found it helped him feel not alone and was soothing to him.  By preschool he was the life of the party but was also showing signs of being a bit different in that he would rock to self soothe when he got overwhelmed and had difficulty learning anything that was not hands on (he would later be diagnosed as dyslexic).  He also had a very short attention span that was noticeable to all.

By about age 5 he had been kicked out of 2 or 3 daycares.  One for talking too much about cigarettes (I guess they thought he was going to bring one to daycare and light up at 4 years old – I have no idea), one for not being able to sit well in a circle and learn at the pace of other children (a very rigid Chuch of Christ daycare – I’m not sure what I was thinking trying that one except that my grandparents had founded it so you’d think they would have cut us some slack but no, they took circle learning and line formation very seriously), and one for talking about his baby brother that had burned to death in a house fire (he didn’t have a baby brother – I think this just freaked them out and they didn’t want to know what stories were coming down the pike).  I eventually took him out of daycares and just hired someone to watch him one-on-one after school which worked great.  Rye got a lot of attention, he got to be home, and the schedule was flexible, nurturing and not over stimulating.

Has he gotten worse over time?

Yes, I guess you could say he has.  By the age of 12 we were all certain he really did have bipolar disorder as he would have times of great mania that could not be contained.  And although he has never tended on the depressive side he has times where he gets very sad and depressed and it moves to threats of suicide quickly.  He would also have rages that went above and beyond a general frustration and would result in couches being thrown across rooms, delusions, and thought dysfunction.

When did Rye move from public schools to home schooling?

Over the years Rye has moved in and out of public school, private school, and home schooling.  His school placement each year has to do with the quality of the public school we are zoned for, how Rye is doing at the time, what his needs are at the time, and where his needs can be best met.  Presently he is in public school and is doing well.  That said, we are in a very good school district right now that is working hard to meet his needs and he has an extensive IEP with a lot of accomodations and flexibility and monitoring.  So it works.

In times that we have home schooled we have not been able to get what we needed from the public schools (because let’s face it, public schools range from great to really horrid and we’ve seen both sides on that).  We found that in bad public schools it is much better for the child to just pull them and home school than it is to torment them with a bad environment.  There are few things worse than a bad public school for a bipolar child.  You will never get and keep a bp child stable in a bad environment.  It’s hard enough in a good environment.

Have you lost a considerable amount of relationships in your life and Rye’s because of his illness?

No, I can’t think of a relationship I’ve lost because of Rye’s illness.  He had lost some friends for periods of time due to erratic and risky behavior that scared his friends (and it’s hard to scare pre-teen/teen boys so that gives you a sense of the power of mania) but the friends came back once he was stabilized.  They knew he was out of control and needed medication and Rye is really fun and a great friend when he is functioning in the normal range.

Now, I have had friends judge me about how I raise Rye.   But here’s the thing, until you’ve walked a mile in my shoes and have a kid like this, you have no idea.  So I just take it all with a grain of salt.   People often assume that normal tactics will work on abnormal kids and that is just flawed thinking.

What are your thoughts on the diagnosis ‘Conduct Disorder’?

Conduct Disorder is a bullshit diagnosis.  It’s a diagnosis given by doctors who want to say your kid is acting a fool and/or is angry and/or is sad and/or has a hard time transitioning between emotions and/or has a hard time processing stimuli and/or has a hard time reading social cues and and/or has some brain damage that we don’t know of yet and aren’t going to try and find – oh, and I have no idea why your child acts the way they do and I don’t want to work too hard to figure it out.  And there is no treatment plan.  So that diagnosis speaks volumes of the doctor that gives it and little about the child in question.

At the baseline kids are sensible.  Kids are raw and honest in their words and actions.  They may not say what adults want to hear but kids don’t act like jerks for no reason.  Their behavior speaks.  If a child is continually acting out, it’s not just that they can’t conform or enjoy being defiant – something is wrong in their emotions or in their thinking or in their problem solving skills.  They are hurting in some way and are doing what they know to show it.

I feel the same way about the diagnosis ‘Oppositional Defiant Disorder’.  That’s just doctor speak for ‘Asshole’ when it really should read ‘Sad and Hurting Child’.  Children that are oppostional are hurting inside and this diagnosis serves no purpose other than to say this child is hurting and I would rather just label them as an asshole than to do my medical duty and try and figure out why.

Where do you go for support groups?

I am a member of a few support groups and I find them to be very helpful.  You can find online support groups through The Balanced Mind Foundation (used to be The Child and Adolescent Bipolar Foundation) and  yahoo groups.  In person groups can be found through NAMI and DBSA,  just to name a few.

Do you think that all people who have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder need to be on psychiatric medications for their whole lives?

I think bipolar disorder is a spetrum disorder so it affects different people in different ways and to different degrees.  Yes, some people need medication their whole life.  Others not.  Some people can manage symptoms on their own.  Others cannot.  I think it’s a fallacy to assume that what works for one person will work for another.  And it is a fallacy to assume that what works for one person in one stage of their life will be necessary for their whole life.  I think teens with bipolar disorder have a tough time because of the hormones involved and the very strong rush of emotions coupled with low levels of life expereince and incomplete brain development.  Older adults may not have the same stabilization needs as teens do.   It’s all a process that needs continual monitoring. And overall I think the less meds the better.  However, it is also very important to have control over one’s own life choices and emotions as you cannot successfully live independently and have successful relationships without this and lots of people cannot do with this without the help of medication.  And there is no shame in that.  Just as there is no shame in taking medication for any other disease or illness/imbalance.

A satisfying, productive, and healthy life with mature relationships is the goal.

_________

I hope this has been helpful.  I’m not sure I addressed everything but I hope I did.

Thanks for the emails.

We met with the new psychiatrist this week.  Or what may become the new psychiatrist.  I say ‘may’ because I have also made an appointment with another psychiatrist so we’ll see who we like better.

So, how was he?  Well, ok, I guess.  This one is fairly young.  He’s less than 10 years out of med school and he’s young, energetic and tried really hard to be ‘hip’ and connect with Rye.  And Rye seemed to like that.  As for me, though, I was a little more leery.  I tend to like older, more tried and true doctors who have seen it all.  Rye’s previous psychiatrist had well over 35 years of experience (he technically could have retired if he had wanted to) and I felt like he was very good at what he does and was very mellow as well.  He didn’t get all hung up in the vernacular of things and was good at seeing the bigger picture.  The new pdoc?  Well, he’s newish in his career and associated with a hospital (he’s on hospital staff) so he has to follow a bunch of criteria whether he wants to or not.  And he has to answer to a bunch of people whether he wants to or not.  And that can get kind of annoying.

For example, he does not like to use the term ‘bipolar’ and feels unsure that Rye really has ‘bipolar’ because after all, he has known us for all of 2 minutes now and do we, as a society, really know what bipolar looks like in a child?  So, he uses the term “Mood Disorder NOS” and gave us a whole mini lecture about it.  Dude, wtf, who the crap cares what you call it? If it makes you feel better to call it Mood Disorder NOS, go for it.   Call it ‘Der Wienerschnitzel’ if you want but let’s not mess with what’s working.    And honestly, let’s not debate what bipolar looks like in a teen.  If your child gets so hyper that they can’t attend school, can’t concentrate, make terrible decisions, engage in dangerous behavior, have no peace of mind, racing thoughts, racing speech, superhuman strength, can’t sleep, can’t relax, get delusional, get paranoid, hear things, see things, have debilitating nightmares…it’s not just a case of the ‘hypers’.  For peet’s sake.  Let’s not reinvent the wheel here.

Another thing, because this psychiatrist is on hospital staff, he has no say in his schedule.  In other words, we saw him for an hour for our initial appointment and going forward we will only be able to see him for 20 minute increments for med checks.  Even if we wanted to see him for hour long appointments and pay out of pocket to get more out of the experience or get more help, we can’t.  He’s not allowed to do that.   So, our fate rests in the hands of someone who knows us not at all and who really can’t get to know us either, even if we wanted to.  Even if we wanted to pay extra for it.  I don’t like the inflexibility of that.

Also, he asked for records.  All of Rye’s records from the dawn of time.  Why?  Because apparently he is going to look them all over and decide if all of these ‘diagnosing’ doctors (his colleagues with much more experience than himself) are right in their diagnosis .  And, because he says it will take their hospital staff 100 years to get the records if we leave it to them (not very reassuring), I need to do it all myself.   Apparently it is out of the question to just pick up the phone and call Rye’s previous pdoc for 5 minutes to get the run-down, colleague to colleague.  And to this end, getting Rye’s records is a pain but overall no big deal and all sounds good and great but let’s think about this…given the fact that we have now already had our allotted one hour appointment and from now on we get 20 minutes every month or up to every 3 months (our choice) to see him in total every year, this record seeking journey hardly seems worth my time.  When is he going to look these records over and when is he going to discuss his findings with us?  In the 3 hours total a year he sees us (of which we’ve already used 1 hour up)?  It’s never going to happen.  Also, he expressed concern that Rye’s learning disabilites may be causing his ‘bipolar’ like behavior.  Ummm, no.  Let’s not be ridiculous.  Learning disabilities don’t land kids in hospitals with crazy erratic behavior and audio and visual hallucinations, etc. etc, etc.

Anyway, the good news?  He is very nice and personable.  And I know he means well.  He appears to be a sweet person.  And Rye really likes him.  And he’s close to our house.  And he’s covered by insurance.  So, we’ll keep him in the running.  And, most importantly, he didn’t change the meds or even ask about changing them.  So that’s good.

Let’s not try and fix what isn’t broken.

_______

As for Dr. Stuart Kaplan and his Newsweek article, here are my thoughts.

Thank you Newsweek Magazine for your cutting edge journalism and breaking scientific studies but Dr. Kaplan is about 20-30 years late to this party.   Childhood bipolar disorder exists.   Is it common?  No.  Is it overdiagnosed and overmedicated in very young children?  Possibly.  But does it exist?  Yes.  And you don’t need an MD or a PhD to figure this out.  Ask any large group of adults with bipolar disorder when their symptoms began and many will tell you in childhood.  Period.  And most of these adults wanted help as children but no one believed them thanks to people like  Dr. Kaplan, propagating the idea that their symptoms were all phony or should be chalked up to something else.   Many of these children attempted suicide.   Some completed their suicide attempts and are no longer around to tell their stories.

Children with ADHD and/or ODD (and is this, ODD, really even a diagnosis?  people aren’t just assholes for no good reason, there is an underlying mood component to this) don’t experience psychosis.  They don’t experience visual and/or auditory hallucinations, they don’t experience incapacitating depression or attempt suicide, they don’t become homicidal, paranoid, delusional, experience thought dysfunction, hypersexuality, and on and on.  And the idea that we can fix these symptoms with stimulants as you would use to treat ADHD ??  Yikes.  There could not be a worse path to take.

And, as for bipolar disorder being trendy. When did this happen??  I can tell you from personal experience, tell people your child is bipolar and about the last response you will get is…’cool!   How can I get on that train? ‘

I know about 5 kids (children and teens) in total with bipolar disorder in our entire community.  And all of them have a direct biological relative with bipolar disorder.  In contrast, 1 in 10 kids now are diagnosed with ADHD.   Teach in any school in America and at least 10% (and sometimes up to 25%) of your class with be on stimulant medication.  Now that is trendy.  And sad.  You can’t tell me that 10%-25% of American children as young as 5 years old need to take speed to function and learn.

Ring, ring…

Dr. Kaplan, the 1980’s are calling and they want your professional opinion on childhood bipolar disorder…

Every teacher and tutor Rye has ever had will tell you very clearly, he has ADHD.  I know it, we know, his pdoc knows it.  It’s obvious.  And has been since he was about 5 years old.  He has a very short attention span when it comes to traditional learning and it takes a very patient teacher to teach him.

So, do we medicate the ADHD?

No, we don’t.

Why?

Well, we’ve tried.  A few times.  And we had good results for a few months and then ultimately had disastrous results.  Mania, psychosis, hospitalization.

With Rye having bipolar disorder and ADHD we choose to make a choice.  We have great stability now with the bipolar disorder and it took us over a year to get to this point.  Rye takes 2 medicines, Depakote & Seroquel.  Seroquel scares the crap out of me and I thank God every day that he is able to be stable on such a low dose (50mg).  I wish he didn’t need it at all.  That said,  there ain’t no way in hell I plan to add more meds to the mix and jeopordize that stability he has just so he can pay attention for longer to do schoolwork.  No way.  Forget it.  Not happening.

Does this make doing schoolwork hard?  Yes.

Does this impede his academic performance?  Yes.

Is this a contributing factor to us homeschooling him?  Yes.

Does it take great patience to teach him?  Yes.

But, so what?

To us, it’s worth it.

He is very active and we keep him very active in sports and other outdoor acitivities.  He needs and loves a lot of physical activity and a lot of time outdoors.

He’s happy most of the time, he’s healthy, and he’s living a very full, loving,  productive life.    That’s what matters to us.

The rest is just book work.

I’ll admit, because we do not watch much television I had no idea this show was on until I read about it on the internet.   And my first thought when I saw that the show was coming on was, What happened to HIPPA and Children’s Right To Privacy?  I really don’t understand why these apply to insurance companies, schools, medical facilities, correction facilities and the court systems but not to the internet and social media.

Anyway, on to the show.   I did not watch the whole show.  I did, however, watch all of the clips available on Oprah’s  website (www.oprah.com) and read the transcripts that are available.

What did I think?

Well, wow.  I’m not really sure what to think.  The show itself was a bit unclear to me as to what Zach’s actual diagnosis is and what the family is doing to help him until I read this.  This is a comment posted by the mom, Laurie, in reaction to some comments on one of the clips:

Posted: Sat 2/19/2011 5:42 PM

LaurieFerris : This is Zach’s mom. I’d like to clarify a few things. He was diagnosed with Sensory Integration Disorder, Severe ADHD, Unspecified Mood Disorder and Tourette’s. Zach was on a variety of psychotropic drugs in the early years which for the most part did not help. He has been off of all medications for the past year and 1/2. We are strong believers in alternative and holistic approaches to helping these children besides using drugs. Proper nutrition, exercise and limited exposure to television, computers and violence are also important. The reason he is living away from home with me is so that he can attend a special school that utilizes alternative approaches such as energy work, yoga, vegetarian diet, meditation etc. to help him with his attention and focus issues, which are also greatly improved. The tics are a result of his Tourette’s, and they are actually much milder than they used to be several years ago. What has helped Zach the most has been “energy work” that he has done for the past two years with an extraordinary counselor who taught Zach to shift his thoughts from negative to positive ones. We believe that Zach is an “energetically sensitive child” and that he has great potential to do wonderful things in the world as long as he stays positive and in the light. Thanks to all who have taken the time to post comments on Oprah’s site.. For more information, you can contact me on facebook at SavingZach or at laurie@energeticallysensitivechild.com.

http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/An-Explosive-Child-Learns-How-to-Cope-Video

So,  Zach was having terrible rages, was violent towards the mom (hence the title of a 7 year old trying to kill his mom), destructive towards the house, etc., etc.  A fairly typical story of an unstable child with a mood disorder.  And especially typical of a child with other brain impairment issues/autism spectrum issues in addition to a mood disorder.  I guess they tried psychiatric medicines and those didn’t work like they wanted [remember, these medications are made for adults, not children, so this often happens - and often times the medications that don't work well on children work really well on those same individuals as teens and adults].  Mom now feels like Zach has holes in his memory due to the meds he took [note: this memory loss could be from the psychosis itself which can cause periods of blackout] and that the meds impaired his learning so they only want to use natural, alternative methods to heal him.  They now rely on Zach (still a child) using visualization techniques and encasing himself in white light to protect himself from the ‘creepy’ voices that tell him to do bad things [voices that can morph into the same voices as his parents and caregivers which adds a complex dimension to trying to shut them out].

Interesting.

In agreement with Laurie, I would argue that all bipolar children and/or autistic and/or spectrum children are “energetically sensitive”.  No doubt about it.  These kids are more in tune with the energies around them and the emotions of those around them than anyone other than them can even imagine.   And this is why it is so incredibly important how one parents these kids and why the environments they are in on a daily basis are so important.   That said,  no child can live in a bubble.  And no parents can be perfect.  And no school can be perfect.  And no environment can be perfect and perfectly stress free.  And Laurie herself admits that Zach used to rage for hours literally no reason at all.  So how is one to control that?

For them, they say a special school, a special diet, no computers, no tv, yoga, mediation, and visualizing the white light are the answer.

Does this seem dangerous to me?  Yes.  Will it work in the long term?  Only time will tell.  It is my personal opinion that leaving a psychotic child’s fate in his own hands and counting on his ability to be able to outsmart and/or out think his mental illness is not an option. After all, prisons, residential treatment centers and psychiatric care facilities are full of people that have tried to do this.  Is it ideal to hope that he can control his own mental illness?  Yes.  Do I understand where mom and dad are coming from in not wanting to use psychiatric drugs with many side effects on their son?  Absolutely. We have been there and did just that.  We took our son off of medications for years from 6-12 years old with success [that said, our son's behaviors were not anywhere near as extreme as Zach's at that age and our son was not hearing voices].  And it worked for us until puberty hit.

As he is still young yet and has not hit the teen years and early adulthood, I think we have not heard the end of the story with Zach.

When I watched Oprah interview Zach and watched her really press him about the voices he hears, poor Zach seemed to be really struggling.  He was extremely tense and did not seem ‘calm and relaxed’ at all, in my opinion.  And he seemed to have a lot going on in his head.  It made me wonder what the voices were saying to him at that moment and I felt really bad for him.  I then felt even worse when Oprah talked about how he is such a positive kid with such good positive energy and how sometimes she interviews really bad, negative people in prison.  People who have tried to kill people.  People who have killed people.  Wait…you mean like Zach?  After all, he is on the show for trying to kill his mom.  He hears voices that tell him to do really bad things.  Things so bad he won’t share with Oprah (or probably anyone else, for that matter) what they say.  And don’t think for a minute that Zach didn’t pick up on that.  These kids are smart as whips.  As are their voices.

Herein lies the danger of these interviews.

Anyway, I wish the best for Zach and his family and I hope for their sake and for Zach’s sake that their chosen treatment method works for them.   We all want what is best for our children and it is true that not all children are significantly helped by psychiatric medications.  Especially ones with complex psychosis.

For us?  We are sticking to the psychiatric medications that are working for our son.  I am grateful every single day that our son is stable on the meds he takes now and he is living a great life.  And I love, love, love it that Brit came on and gave such a good message of hope for Zach and his family.   Brit has bipolar disorder and was apparently on Oprah years ago as a child for exhibiting behaviors similar to Zach.  Brit now says that due to getting a correct diagnosis of bipolar disorder and being on the right medication he is stable and happy and in college living out his dreams.  You can see the clip here:

http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/Brits-Triumph-Over-Childhood-Mental-Illness-Video/topic/oprahshow

Brit is an inspiration and a true success story.  And I wish only the best for Zach and his family.

Over Christmas in a complete six degrees of separation type of occurrence we found out where BigB is living.  Just like that.  After years of having no idea if he is dead or alive or what the case may be and without looking for the information at all… boom.  One conversation with one person I reconnected with via a Christmas card and there it is.  Oh yea, they say, I saw BigB the other day and was asking him about you.  Say wha?? I say.   Yea, BigB lives near us with so and so and has for a while.  Oh.  Well.  There it is then.  The one thing Rye has been wondering for years now.  Just falls into our lap.  Like it’s nothing.  As if it’s random.

Which, of course, it’s not.

So, I debate.  Do I tell Rye or do I not tell him.  Will it hurt him or help him.  I decide to tell him.  After all, I’ve been listening for years now about how he wants to find BigB when he turns eighteen.  What he’ll say to him.  What he’ll do.  And so on.  And I’m not one to keep anything from Rye.  He’s deserves to know.  So I told him.

“Well,” Rye says, “it’s nice to know he’s not in jail or in prison or dead.”

“What do you think?  How do you feel? Does this make you want to contact him?”  I ask.

[pause]

“No,” he says.

“Do you want to see him?”  I ask.

“No,” he says.

“Ok,” I say.

And that was that.  I have not heard a word of it since.

___________

And then last night I had a dream.  And it was so real it feels like it actually happened.  I dreamt that BigB was heavily using drugs, as he has a lengthy history of doing, and was in bad shape.  We had not seen him in years and years and yet he came to see us and was falling apart and needed help so Don and I took him to rehab.  And Rye helped us.  And it as weird because as a unit Don, Rye and I wanted to see him be well.  We wanted him to be ok again.  We wanted to help him.

And that was it.

What does it all mean?  I have no idea.  But I feel certain it will all be revealed in time.

__________________

And as an aside…

Dear Mimi Silbert at Delancey Street,

It would have been so helpful if a few years back you would have acknowledged 12 step programs and a higher power as being not only helpful to but vital to your residents for long term recovery from drug and alcohol dependence and acknowledged and accepted without prejudgment or stigma that a good many of your participants suffer from completely treatable mental illnesses that, if correctly diagnosed and treated, could save them from a life of self-medicating, addiction, antisocial behavior and/or prison recidivism.  I mean, really, where is the shame in a little lithium?   It saves people’s lives.  It saves families.  It gives kids their parents back.

Consider it.

Sincerely,

Meg

if Rye is going to have a hard time making good decisions for himself as he gets older.  And sometimes it really scares me.  It’s tricky because at times he can be such a  mature and astute kid and can make really good decisions, is a good conversationalist and seems to really have his head on right.  When we travel or are at dinner parties, gatherings, etc. he always gets compliments  from adults on how well he interacts with adults and they are always impressed with how outgoing, level headed and mature he seems for his age.  However, at other times you just wonder what in the blessed world he is thinking and why he makes the choices he does.  Especially after he’s been around a lot of kids his own age.  And even more especially when he’s around the kids from his [previous] school.  It’s like he loses half of his brain cells.  And I know a part of that is just being 13 years old.  And I know a part of it is just the intermittent immaturity of growing up.  But a part of it is just him as well.  He is so greatly influenced by his environment it’s incredible.  And it can be a bit nerve racking at times.

Nerve racking.

Because we really have to work hard to control his environment.  He is truly a chameleon that completely changes completely according to what environment he’s in.  I mean completely changes.   I’m just so glad he is out of public school.  He learned more bad stuff there then I ever could have even imagined.  It’s crazy.  And I know there are millions of kids that do great in public school and for them I am so happy,  but mine was just not one of them.

Definitely not one of them.

Yes, we are officially homeschooling again.

And now we’ll need a few days to decompress from the ‘heightened state of awareness’ lifestyle we’ve become accustomed to living.

Because when you are a special needs child or the parent of a special needs child and you are dealing with lower functioning public schools [of which there are way too many here in the often frustratingly backward Southern States], you become used to functioning at a very high internal frequency.  A state of heightened awareness and anxiety.  You hope for the best and yet continually find yourself always waiting for the call of doom.  Always waiting to hear what’s wrong with your child or what’s not being done or how your kid is not meeting expectations and what your kid is not doing… and on…and on….and on.  And everything that goes wrong is always your child’s fault.  The school is never, ever to blame.  Or is, God forbid, incompetent.

It’s exhausting.

And ultimately a waste of time, energy, self esteem, and resources.

So, once again, we bailed.  We pulled the plug.  We dared to wish for more and cried ‘Uncle’.  And thanks to Don (we love you Don!) we are lucky to have that option as the cost on all of our souls was becoming just too high.

And now…we are free!

No more worrying about IEPs that aren’t being followed.  No more annoyance over BIPs that aren’t being followed.  No more expecting people and teachers and administrators to do the right thing.  Or to do things they are supposed to do but are never actually going to do, despite being obligated by law.  Because, as many of you know, when push comes to shove the laws only are only in place to protect the schools and their staff and not the actual students.

But alas, no more.

It’s over.

Over, I say.

Now we just need to allow our bodies and minds relax again.   The experiment is over.  Public schools are not for us.  We are gypsies at heart.  Non-conformists, I suppose.   We like to march to our own drum.

Hello, relaxed homeschool life.  We’ve missed you!

Check the video out.  It’s really interesting.

I definitely have one of the kids that is told at school that they will never succeed in life because they can’t get the ‘one right answer’.  And yet, this same child can find so many alternate answers if anyone would just ask about them or be open to them.

Thanks to Christine at www.welcometomybrain.net for posting this video for me to see and pass on.

Oh dear.  I cannot even express to you how horrified I am by this column.  I started with his advice on Serotonin Syndrome and it went from there.  Here was my journey:

_________

Reader Question: What antidepressants help serotonin syndrome sufferers?

Dr. Raison Answer:

The answer is: Try an antidepressant that does not have appreciable serotonin activity. The most obvious choice in this regard would be bupropion (brand name Wellbutrin), an antidepressant that affects the norepinephrine and dopamine systems, but leaves serotonin untouched. Another option would be an older antidepressant called desipramine (brand name Norpramin).

My Response:

According to the Mayo Clinic, Wellbutrin can be a prime contributor to Serotonin Syndrome. As the Mayo Clinic describes:

A number of over-the-counter and prescription drugs can lead to serotonin syndrome, especially antidepressants. Illicit drugs and dietary supplements also can cause the condition. These drugs and supplements include but aren’t limited to:

• Serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), antidepressants such as citalopram (Celexa), fluoxetine (Prozac, Sarafem), fluvoxamine, paroxetine (Paxil) and sertraline (Zoloft)
• Serotonin and norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (SNRIs), antidepressants such as trazodone and venlafaxine (Effexor)
• Bupropion, an antidepressant and tobacco-addiction medication (Wellbutrin, Zyban)
• Monoamine oxidase inhibitors (MAOIs), antidepressants such as isocarboxazid (Marplan) and phenelzine (Nardil)
• Anti-migraine medications such as almotriptan (Axert), naratriptan (Amerge), sumatriptan (Imitrex) and zolmitriptan (Zomig)
• Pain medications such as fentanyl (Sublimaze), meperidine (Demerol), pentazocine, (Talwin) and tramadol (Ultram)
• Lithium (Eskalith, Lithobid), a mood stabilizer
• Illicit drugs, including LSD, Ecstasy, cocaine and amphetamines
• Herbal supplements, including St. John’s wort and ginseng
• Over-the-counter cough and cold medications containing dextromethorphan (Robitussin DM, Sudal DM)
• Anti-nausea medications such as granisetron (Kytril), metoclopramide (Reglan) and ondansetron (Zofran)
• Linezolid (Zyvox), an antibiotic
• Ritonavir (Norvir), an anti-retroviral medication used to treat HIV/AIDS

My bet is with the Mayo Clinic.  How about you?

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Reader Question:  How can I stop using Paxil without the side effects?

Dr. Raison Answer:

The good news is that only about 20 percent of patients who take antidepressants experience these type of withdrawal symptoms when they discontinue the medications, and when experienced, these symptoms are usually mild and resolve in a week or two…

But remember that most people can stop an antidepressant cold and won’t have symptoms.

My Response:

This advice is irresponsible and horribly misleading.   Antidepressants are more often than not quite hard to discontinue.  And some people never are able to discontinue.   Most people cannot stop them cold and have no symptoms.  And especially not Paxil.  Just ask all of the thousands of people at www.paxilprogress.org or Phil Lawrence who made an entire documentary film about this called Numb.  Search the internet for Effexor withdrawal or Zoloft withdrawal.  Search YouTube for video accounts.  Read the accounts of people trying to withdraw on Furious Seasons or Beyond Meds. Read accounts of people discontinuing at www.crazyboards.org

And to make someone asking for advice feel like “most people” can discontinue with no issues is unethical and immoral.  Period.

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Reader Question: My son hears suicidal voices.  What can I do?

Dr. Raison Answer:

I’ve seen thousands of patients over the years, and I can assure you that the most powerful factor in good outcomes for people with serious mental illness is the commitment of family members to keep on trying…

When you do feel discouraged, try to imagine all the patients I have treated, or advised on, who had their lives turned around for the better when the right treatment for that particular patient was finally found and instituted.

My Response:

As a mom of a child who has heard voices, I feel particularly drawn to this question.  First, Dr. Raison gives no actual advice or help here but tells how childhood psychosis is uncommon and urges the writer to keep trying to get help.  This in and of itself shows the ridiculousness and dangerousness of even having these serious questions and answers in an online advice column.  Second, if your son is hearing suicidal voices and you have no treatment plan of action with your home psychiatrist, your child is in grave danger and you need to get the child to the hospital where they can be evaluated.  The voices could have an organic origin, they could be caused by medication prescribed for a psychiatric diagnosis (they mentioned ADHD in the question).  It could be a number of things.  But the child is not safe.  Dr. Raison never once says this.  The child is not safe while hearing these voices.  I know.  I’ve been there.  And you would expect a sound psychiatrist to point this out.

As for the end of his response when Dr. Raison tells the parent not to get discouraged and to think of all of the patients he has seen over the years and how they have all been helped.  How does this help this parent?  Especially when he has offered them no actual advice but to keep trying.  This response is so incredibly arrogant and disgusting it is almost mind boggling.   The ego that has to involved for someone to write this to a parent whose child is hearing voices telling them to kill himself is so vile it makes me sick to my stomach.  Obviously the family involved does not have the right treatment right now or they would not be in this predicament.  If they had the right treatment, they would know what to do when this happens.   And mistakenly they are writing to Dr. Raison for advice regarding help on how to get a plan.

I guess if the child goes ahead and kills himself it is due to the parents just not trying hard enough.

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These were only the first three questions and answers I happened upon as they were linked to each other.

I didn’t have the heart to read more.