Raising Bipolar

Well, I’d say overall it’s been a medium to good day (medium as in mediocre, not channeling the dead) over here.

It started out with Rye having a complete meltdown before school.  He was overtired and I’m sure the excitement and anticipation of the dance was weighing on him as well.   Anyway, he fell apart over us not being able to successfully sync and reload his ipod at the crack of dawn and just fell into a bag of tears over it.  Well, I take that back, before he cried he got really raging mad, hitting, yelling, etc but then quickly moved to crying  and did that for a good 5-10 minutes.  Then he was able to pull it together and we made it to school on time. He made it through school and right now is at the dance so I’m guessing the emotional release of the morning helped clear him out to make it through the day.  I guess we all need a good blast off and cry sometimes.  It helps clear the soul of it’s excess energy so it doesn’t all stay inside and turn into a tumor. Anyway, I can’t wait to hear later how the dance went.

As for me, I dropped Rye at school and then went to substitute teach at the Alternative School near us for the day.  The Alternative School, you know, the school for those middle and high school kids.  The kids with records, the kids with probation officers and the kids that have all been kicked out of their regular school for whatever reason.

I love the Alternative School.  It’s my favorite place to sub.  The school is very structured, the class sizes are tiny, the other teachers are quirky and nice, the administration is tattooed and looks like they came straight out of prison but are actually upstanding educated citizens, and the kids are unique and interesting.  And, best of all, they like me at the Alternative School which makes me like it all the more.  They know my name.  They smile when I come in.  They thank me for coming.  It’s truly lovely.

I started the day off a bit shaky as Rye had been so emotional and typically it’s hard not to have that wear off on me some.  As a result I kind of powered through the morning but was a bit mopey and kind of on the verge of tears myself.  But, I made it through.  Then, after lunch, something really cool happened.  I had a class with one girl in it (yes, that’s right, one girl)  and she came in and looked at me and not knowing me at all said, “Hey, I am so excited to meet you.  I’ve seen you around school today and I’ve been dying to meet you and get to know you all day.”

Ok, I don’t know know what it was about that statement but it made my day.  It made my day to know that someone saw me and then wanted to meet me and wanted to talk to me just because they were curious.  And she was so sincere.  It was real.  She was real.  And let me tell you ,this was one tough cookie of a girl.  I’ll bet in a different circumstance she could be quite a rough girl if need be.  But here she had her guard down.  And she was open.  And reaching.  And receptive.  And welcoming.  And it was great.  Really great.  And her sincerity and open spirit turned my day around.

We talked for a while, she got her work done and after that the rest of the school day went really fast.

The void I was feeling from the morning had been filled.  I had made a difference in someone’s day.  A positive difference.  A good mark on society, if you will.  And it felt good.  Really good.

I guess when you think about it that’s what we all want, isn’t it?  To be seen.  To be heard.  To be wanted.

And ultimately, if we are lucky, to be understood.